Lill-Muzika

Inti li twennisni, inti li tmellisni,
Irridek qabel norqod, ghandi bzonnok malli nqum,
F'hajti ghal dejjem int se ddum.

Inti li ssabbarni, inti li ssawwarni,
Irridek kull x'hin nghajja, ghandi bzonnok jien fil-ferh,
Ghax ta' mohhi inti s-serh.

Fik jien nizvoga, fik jien nizbroffa,
Il-ferh, il-gmiel, l-iswed u d-dmugh,
Ghandek jien nigi, sabiex intaffi l-guh.

Ghal dejjem jien tieghek, ghal dejjem int tieghi,
Inti twelidt mieghi, ghentni nikber, nimmatura,
Waqt li noghdos fik, hemm nara hajti tiehu s-sura.

Tezori Kkuluriti

Kuluri, fjuri,
Lilek jien irrid nuri,
Kwiekeb u xmux,
Sofor daqs il-lellux,
Natura, hdura,
'Il fuq lanqas hajbura,
Izraq il-bahar,
Li bih ta' min jiftahar,

Nitfaghhom kollha f'kaxxa,
Bihom noqghod nitpaxxa,
Nerfaghhom taht is-sodda,
Sabiex dawn jibqghu godda,

Jonkella nurihomlok,
K'joghgbuk jien intihomlok,
Biex jixeghlu nara ghajnejk,
U t-tbissima fuq haddejk,

Mel'ejja halli tara,
Ta' dal-gmiel pur ix-xmara,
Dat-tezori la tahlix,
Tibdilhomx int mat-tgerfix,
Timrah fihom inhallik,
Jekk thallini nafda fik,
Tgawdihom, iddakkarhom,
Ghozzhom izda le sakkarhom.

A Children's Tale

I used to watch the world go by everyday, from my shelf.  Well, Monday to Saturday, since on Sundays the environment around us hibernated.  We would sleep our way through the day until 8.30 a.m. sharp the following morning.  It had taken me ages to get used to the chime that Mr. Buzzlefair had placed over the door.  The sound had been too startling.  Listening to it each time a client came in had been far from my favourite past-time.  I had overheard old Mr. Buzzlefair explain to his irritated wife, after she'd taken the chime down for the nth time (God bless her), that it was useful for them to be aware of clients coming and going. 

Mr. Buzzlefair's little toyshop was not always a busy one and I did not like standing and staring all day on Mr. Buzzlefair's shelf.  I had tried more than a few times to run away while Mr. Buzzlefair wouldn't be looking.  THAT is the real reason why I hated the door chime so much.  It was a threat to my freedom.  As soon as I opened the door, Mr. Buzzlefair would come running and find me lying still on the floor, and then he would wonder for ages how on earth I had ended down there. 

My friend Beatrice used to scold me frequently.  She was a very obedient and quiet little doll.  I loved Beatrice to bits, she'd always been the sweet one.  I...I was the ambitious one.  We used to spend hours chatting on our shelf side-by-side, until one day she was bought by a poor, shabby, little girl.  It had been a nightmare for me.  I still remember the way I had trembled in alarm and fear of being picked by that little brat.  That wasn't the way I had planned for myself to end up.  I had always dreamt of belonging to a nice, rich family who could take proper care of me.  "Can I take this one please?" the girl had asked respectfully to her mother.  Beatrice had been chosen.  I wasn't surprised.  Her sweet smile never left her cheeks.  I still feel tears welling in my eyes when I recall her smiling, blowing me kisses from the counter and whispering goodbye, while the door chimed open & she was carried away.

Now I was alone.  I kept refusing to look charming to all the little girls who came in and I did my best to hide myself behind all the balls and the dirty boyish toytrucks, who were always calling me a stuck-up; anything as long as I wouldn't be bought.  I had fancied no-one as the person who would play with me all their life. 

One quiet day, while I was bored to death fumbling with the trimmings on my dress, I heard the bells chime.  I looked up with disinterest and saw a very pretty girl, dressed stylishly despite her young age.  I straightened up and gathered that her father had brought her to our toyshop to buy a nice gift for her birthday.  For the first time in weeks I decided it was time for me to smile.  I watched her studying all of us in a row, while I kept my fingers crossed behind my back.

The first few days as Casey's doll were a dream come true.  I was treated with respect and my little mistress showered me with affection everyday, until one day I woke up to a huge row coming from downstairs.  I heard Casey shouting at her mother and running up the stairs.  She slammed the bedroom door open and started throwing all her other toys across the floor.  "Thank God, she loves more more," I thought.  Then, to my extreme surprise she grabbed me and pulled out my right hand.  I felt myself being flung in the air and out the window!  I fell for what seemed like ages and finally hit the ground with a thud.  The world went black.

I dont know how many hours passed till I regained consciousness.  I woke up, battered and bruised.  It took me all effort to get up on my feet and start walking.  I was never going back to Casey's again.  Was this how wealthy girls took care of their dolls?  I made my way through the wood and found myself by a river.  As I was going to sit down and rest for a while, I spotted a little girl playing.  She looked familiar.

I approached them curiously and when I was near enough I recognised them.  There was Beatrice being pampered with plaits on her head that her mistress had just made.  I was too embarassed to call out, but Beatrice spotted me and she jumped up.  "Oh look another doll!"  Mary told Beatrice.  "Poor thing, look how dirty she is.. and she's got no arm!!"  She lifted me up.  "Let me take care of you sweet thing," she whispered in my ear as she kissed my face.  "Mommy won't say no to you.  We don't have any money to buy you new clothes, but you will be safe with me," she smiled.

Beatrice looked overjoyed.  "This is where love and care come from," I could feel her teasing.  Too bad my arm had to be pulled off before I could realise what should really mean to me.  At least now I was safe, and more importantly, back with Beatrice.   I wanted to tell her about all that had happened but Beatrice shushed me fondly.  "You're tired.  Just feel safe.  We'll talk later."  And I closed my eyes and let go of my thoughts as I concentrated on the sound of birds and the river and opened myself to a poor girl's love.

A drunken expression

My head is spinning,
My ears are whistling,
My brain's rotating,
My body's aching..

I can still hear the music... playing so loud,
Feel the pushing and shoving... of that large crowd,
I still feel the trickle...  Vodka in my throat,
I feel the effect... this chosen antidote..

Despite all this chaos,
You're there in my mind,
In my veins with that alcohol,
It's you that I find..

So I'm now off to sleep,
Into my dreams let me leap,
I hope I find you there too,
I just wanna be there.. with you.

Griż Skur

Inħares 'il barra,
'Il barra mit-tieqa,
U hemmhekk kulma nara,
Il-griż, temp tad-dieqa.

Inkompli jien nifli,
Kuluri bla ħajja,
Ħlief kultant xi aħmar,
Ta' karozza titlajja.

Ir-riħ qawwi jvenven,
Isabbat u jtajjar,
Xita qalila nieżla,
Timla' l-bjar u l-ixmajjar.

Imma jien la nkun ġewwa,
B'dan xejn ma niddejjaq,
Għax naħdem u nisgħar,
U l-istress infejjaq.

Ix-xemx tkun darb'ohra,
Meta sħab ma jkunx hemm,
Meta nlesti minn xogħli,
U mill-għaraq tad-demm.

Għalhekk inżel xita,
Għax xogħol fadal xi jsir,
Meta mbagħad ngħidlek jiena,
Tibqax timla' l-bir!!

Candles and Flowers

It was pitch dark, except for the brief light coming from the occasional car driving by.  An ordinary person would surely have considered it eery.  The burning flames in the red candle-holders were flickering gently, dancing with the soft, warm September breeze.  The old gates were always locked at night, but Julie had gotten used to secretly working her way in through the hedge at the back.  She walked down the long, cobblestone passage-way, keeping her eyes forward.  She did not need to look around, she'd been there so many times in the last three years that she could find her way blindfolded.  Her twin sister's tomb was at the far end to the right.

Julie could smell the strong scent of flowers tickling her nose.  Eyes closed, one would think he was in some garden, where flowers bloomed and radiated sweet scents everywhere.  But the flowers and the lapping, thin tongues of fire on each tomb were just about the only things alive in this place.  Otherwise death lingered in the darkness, in the silence, in the chilly atmosphere which could be felt even though Summer had not yet come to an end.  Julie didn't care, she just couldn't be bothered anymore.  There had been a time when she used to find all this fascinating, but since the day her twin had left her to face the world alone, there were very few things which could still fascinate Julie.  Still, she couldn't help but notice how sharp her senses were in there.  "It's funny how I can see, smell and hear more, when I'm here," she thought to herself as she paid attention to the buzzing of bees in the trees.  However, it was not only the sharpening of her physical senses that Julie noticed.  She had also trained her mind much beyond that, or rather, her sister Jade had trained it for her.

Julie was aware of her keen intuition, her extra-sensory perceptions, the strange deja-vus she had started experiencing from the very first night she had started sleeping alone in their bedroom.  Jade had taught her to recognise and read the signals she sent her.  At first Julie had been confused and overwhelmed by all this.  She refused to share her experiences with anyone, not even her parents who were still sorely grieving Jade's loss.  Julie knew they wouldn't understand. 

Julie was handling it all brilliantly by herself.  It made her feel special, her twin's chosen one.  Whenever she was passing through a difficult moment, she would ask her sister for help... and she'd get it.  During the first year of Jade's passing, Julie had been able to feel her sister's presence very vividly, but as time went by, her sister's visits had become less and less evident.  She had learnt that her sister's connection to the world would weaken with time, however the subtle signals would always remain there.  Jade could never leave Julie alone.  They were too precious for each other, they had done everything together; from the moment of conception till their 20th birthday.  The twins' birthday had been the wretched day when Jade had tragically lost her life...

It had been a sunny morning in March.  They had agreed with their friends and boyfriends that they would meet in the afternoon and stay out till late.  It was a tradition in the girls' family, that the morning would be spent with the parents, so that their mother could cook a special meal for them by request and then they would blow their candles and cut the cake.  Their grandparents would be invited over and then there would be gifts to be opened, kisses and hugs to be exchanged.  Alas, this was not the chain of events which would be reproduced in Julie's diary entry of the 17th March 2008.

"Jade, I'm here."  Julie spoke in the direction of her twin's portrait stuck to the pale white marble.  "Honey, you shouldn't come so late at night," she could feel her sister answering.  "You know you can call me from anywhere and I'll be right by your side."  Julie knew this very well, but a nightly visit to the cemetery once every two weeks had become part of her system.  "It felt like ages since I paid you a visit.. I felt guilty," replied Julie inside her mind.  "And I need you, I really need you.  In times like these, I miss you so much, sis.  I feel the need to tell you what happened, to know your opinion, to see what you would do."  "Darling, there's not a single move that you make alone," Jade whispered in her mind.  "I am there by your side, watching over you.  I watch your every mistake, your every triumph.  I am aware of every tear, your every frown and your every smile.  I am not here to take away your pain or to make your life easier.  But I am here to help you build your strength and to help you come out of your storms with flying colours.  There is no way in which you can grow wiser, unless you taste the bitterness.  Your heart would lose its tenderness if you never shed a tear.  You would not be able to teach your children, the best that there is to be learnt.  That is exactly why I let you get yourself into trouble!" Jade concluded jokingly. 

Silence.

Julie felt warm tears streaming down her cheeks, but they were not tears of sadness.  It was always a bittersweet emotion to feel her sister so close, yet so far away from her.  But she was satisfied.  She already felt stronger.  Somewhat, she always went home filled with a positive energy after such a visit, ready to fight every war and to grab every opportunity tossed her way.

She took out a lighter from her pocket and relit the candle, which had been blown out by a sudden gust of wind a few moments earlier.  She then got up, smiled at her sister's photo for the last time that week, and started walking back to the hole in the hedge.....